Wow am I bugged!

You know sometimes you just want to strangle someone. Yes, they have a name, but I can't say it on here! duh!! No family members guys, so don't stress ok?
Seriously, I have to ask myself this question all the time, who do they think they are? I mean, SERIOUSLY! They must think they are pretty much all that to think they can say and do whatever they please, come and go as they please. There is something said for putting your time in, paying your dues, you know all the cliches. Why when you are trying to live by the rules and do all the right things, someone can just walk right in, decide what they want and get it? It is most irritating. Am I rambling? Yes I am and guess what, I don't care.

How can people be so into themselves that they forget other people's feelings? Does that come from an inner insecurity they have with themselves, so they have to continually build themselves up in their own minds to validate who they are? I believe so. Insecurities are a worrisome monster. I guess I have my own insecurities, who doesn't right? But more than anything else, I try to consider other people's feeling and what they are going through.

I really hate that person who thinks their life if more important than mine. In their eyes, I'm sure it is, but really everyone has their own story, their own life that they think is first and foremost in importance. Isn't that called being selfish? I need to learn to be more selfish I guess. Ok, that works.

Things will be fine, I vented. I am feeling better and now a diet pepsi will help even more.

Letting them make their own decisions...

One of the hardest things I have had to learn as my children get older and that is once they turn 18, they can pretty much make their own decisions. It's harder than you think. You've been in "mommy" mode for so long, where you have control where they go, who they go with, what time they need to be home, and then all of a sudden--whoosh! They are 18 and on their own.

I remember when I was 18 and on my own, I didn't know what to do. You don't really want to ask your parent's advice, because aren't you supposed to be making your own decisions? But give me a break, you've never made ALL your decisions before.

There is no manual, there are no "how to" directions. It's just day by day. Each day you learn a little bit more and a little bit more. Will you ever know everything? I hope not. I hope we all will continue to learn. Will they ever stop needing mom's opinion? I hope not. But whatever decision my babies need to make, I hope they will think about it and think about the pros and cons of the decision. I hope they look at how it will benefit them, benefit others in their lives and if there are better options for them.

This weekend is good!!

I love this weekend. So far, it's been productive and relaxing. Friday night, we cut up the tree limbs from the backyard, piled them in a trailer for Grandpa Jim. Ron mowed "Gabe's Jungle" down and now Gracie needs to find a new hiding place for her leather glove. (That's a whole other story.)
Saturday, Robbie and Brandee, were over dump detail. I don't know how many trips they made to the dump, but it was a lot! We cleaned up the backyard, got rained on which was good! It was a great fall day. The dogs were outside playing fetch and loving every second of it. We ate some Subway Sandwiches for lunch.

Last night, Grandpa Ron and Grandma Julie babysat Gabe. It was fun. We had a "pajama party" as Gabe says, watched The Bee Movie and ate popcorn. That movie was really funny. Really, you guys need to watch it. Gabe fell asleep in the middle, but me and Grandpa finished watching it.

Cam and Ellie babysat too at their house. Katie....was probably sleeping, because that's all she does these days. She is our Sleeping Beauty. I talked to my dad last night and he knew me and told me he loved me. It was a great day!

General Conference this weekend tops it off as the perfect weekend. Staying in your comfy clothes on Sunday is the best. Brandee is cooking dinner and so I am being lazy and playing on the computer.

I hope you all had a great weekend.

Getting old

This week has been interesting. My dad came to stay with our family for a few days while his wife went out of town. My dad turned 76 last month and has recently been diagnosed with Alzheimers, which makes me sad. He recognizes everyone still and remembers things in the past, but it's his short term memory that he has troubles with.
Dad is and always has been my hero. I would just love to do things with him, no matter what. I remember when he would be outside practicing basketball with Andy and I would be sitting on the grass and remember wishing I was Andy. I would go with him on service calls and believe it or not I learned quite a bit.

Last week when he was here, we took him fishing. We didn't catch much, but my boys were impressed that I could cast a fishing pole. Something my dad taught me.

My dad has taught me many things. He taught me to love baseball. He loved baseball more than anyone I ever met. Whenever he talked about baseball, he would get a smile on his face.

My dad taught me to love ice cream. I love to eat ice cream. Dad didn't really have a favorite flavor that I know of, but he loved to eat it every night while we were growing up.

This getting old thing is different. But yet it's not a bad thing. I find myself liking to shop by myself and buying things for me instead of for my kids. I told Ron the other day, I can't remember the last time I bought myself 2 pairs of shoes, because the kids always came first.

It was hard taking care of my dad, but he took care of me for twenty years or more, so I guess I owe him a lot more than a few days of companionship. Thanks for the memories, Dad.

Happy Birthday to me!

Happy Birthday to me!!

Yes, it is my 50th birthday today! I am kinda excited for it. Not for the fact that I am 50, but I am proud of the person I am (except I need to be skinnier) and the things I have accomplished in my life. Raising three children....who have turned out to be the most awesome people I know. (Ron helped out a little with this).
Rob....works hard to provide for his family. His priorities are in the right place and that makes me proud. He likes to play the Wii with me!
Cam....has found the love of his life (which makes me so so happy). He calls me everyday, which I love. Not every 23 year old does that ya know.
Katie....is on the right track. She is being responsible and doing good in college. It is so important for her to get a college education, especially as a woman.

I always miss my mom on my birthday. I know she is wishing me happy birthday up in heaven, but it's just not the same. It's a mom thing I guess. She gave me life so she should be here to celebrate my life with me. I hate alcohol. It is evil.

I am not going to get a tattoo....that's just not me. I will save it for Cam.
I am not going to get drunk....bad memories. I can celebrate non-alcoholic.
I am not going to go skydiving. I am not there yet.
I think I will wait to go to Vegas for Ron's birthday.
I am not going to go to Yellowstone either....because I need to lead the music for those cute little kids in the Sacrament Meeting program next Sunday. They make me smile.

Basically, I am pretty happy with me. I definitely want to be thinner and in a year I hope I will be. I try to be a good person, a good mom and a good wife. I don't need to change who I am for this one day. I need to be true to who I am and the standards I have set for me! Not anyone else, just for me! I have a forever family....and one of these days, way far in the future I hope, I will celebrate my birthday with my mom.